Gutterballs: I Warned You Not to Bowl Tonight


The Metamodern. Film: Gutterballs II

A Film by Alastair Gamble
Review by Jerimiah Anderson White Douglas

Over the past several years horror movie aficionados and gore hounds alike have been treated to a resurgence in the “slasher” film, which comes much needed after the dry spell that was 90’s horror. Many of the films that we are left with today are mere shadows of what the great stalk and slash films of yesteryear use to be. Leaving any notion of suspense and fun at the door, most current films seem to be OK with strapping the main characters to a chair and pulling their teeth out systematically. In the land of pure retro slasher action Gutterballs is king.

The film itself is set entirely in a bowling alley as two rival bowling teams compete for the top prize. As it often happens with these things a fight breaks out among the opposing teams, causing everyone to kind of go off on their own for sex, sex and more SEX! Suddenly a new name appears on the screen BBK, people start disappearing, hairdos are upset, egos are bruised. Could it all have to do with a brutal rape that happened in the very same spot? Is someone out for revenge? Me thinks so daddy, me thinks so.

Gutterballs is really a movie that fans of pure 80’s slasher films can sink their teeth into. It’s as if we have discovers that long sought after big box movie that is impossible to find and filtered it through the lens of a Doris Wishman sleaze epic with all the sex and nudity in tact. Every frame of Ryan Nicholson’s film is bathed in neon colors that give it that USA: Up All Night 80’s sleaze vibe that is so mother fucking infectious it nearly rendered me comatose. The directing is very tight and moves along at a crisp gonzo like pace that gives it that “fun” slasher vibe despite some of it’s nastier moments, of which it has many.

Gutterballs is a film that wallows in it’s hideously fun gore effects, which are very well done and delights in showing every nasty detail. The prosthetics and gore effects are kick ass and blow many big studio computer driven films clean out the fucking water. A particular nasty scene involves a very graphic, well pornographic, “69″ scene that ends with both character getting a “mouthful”, Gutterballs is so seedy, so classless and assured of it’s lurid sensibilities that it comes across as almost charming to any lover of “sleaze” cinema. I have always been a huge fan of the rape revenge genre; combine that with a 80’s themed slasher that hits all the right notes in the sleaze department ala Blood Frenzy, Blood Diner, etc. You had me at hello.

The Metamodern. Film: Gutterballs
Image from

The cast itself was extremely spot on, spouting out line after line of brutal obscenities and doing so with wit and conviction. Color me excited. A particular shout out must go to Alastair Gamble as the sadistic preppie leader. Mr. Gamble oozed scumminess out of every scene and was very easy on this little ladies eyes and finger tips.

Ryan Nicholson’s third feature following Torched (also a rape themed movie, Yum), Necrophagia: Nightmare Scenarios (a kick ass rockumentary of sorts), Live Feed (a sleazy little torture film); is a true sleaze classic in the making. Mr. Nicholson is a true maverick of modern underground cinema and with this feature he proves he is a force to be reckoned with. Don’t Fuck with the MF BBK, Beotches!


The Metamodern. Film: Gutterballs 2
Gutterballs 2: Exclusive first stills from

Metamodern Film. ReviewsJerimiah lives in Des Moines, IA with husband Corey Douglas. A freelance writer for (as Demonica Vansant) and other media outlets. Jerimiah is an independent film maker with several acting/directing credits under his name. He is currently in production on his first experimental feature entitled “Little Pigs” for release sometime in late 2017.

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